Ruffled mind, restless pillow

I never knew perfection til
I heard you speak, and now it kills me
Just to hear you say the simple things
Now waking up is hard to do
And sleeping is impossible too
Everything is reminding me of you
What can I do?

It’s not right, not OK
Say the words that you say
Maybe we’re better off this way?
I’m not fine, I’m in pain
It’s harder everyday
Maybe we’re better off this way?
It’s better that we break…

A fool to let you slip away
I chase you just to hear you say
You’re scared and that you think that I’m insane

The city look so nice from here
Pity I can’t see it clearly
While you’re standing there, it disappears
It disappears

It’s not right, not OK
Say the word it should say

Maybe we’re better off this way?
I’m not fine, I’m in pain
It’s harder everyday
Maybe we’re better off this way?
It’s better that we break

Saw you sitting all alone
You’re fragile and you’re cold, but that’s all right
Life these days is getting rough
They’ve knocked you down and beat you up
But it’s just a rollercoaster anyway, yeah

It’s not right, not OK
Say the words that you say
Maybe we’re better off this way?
I’m not fine, I’m in pain
It’s harder everyday
Maybe we’re better off this way?


I cannot relate to most love songs, especially chinese ones.

Most of the time, the sadness is over-exaggerated from heartbroken-but-I-will-move-on to I-want-to-die-I-cannot-live-without-you. I feel even sadder than I need to after listening to such songs and I generally abstain from it. Apart from the occasional karaoke sessions with the 必点情歌s like 安静，你不知道的事，借口，Forever Love blah blah...


But this song, yeah. I wouldn't exactly call it a love song? It's a more relatable song about the pysche of a heartbroken person. Or me at least (when I used to be hrtbrkn). So I find it kinda nice? Haha at least nice enough for me to indulge in and reminisce past relationships.

Okay talking bout love and stuff is really not my element. I feel extremely awkward in doing so. Haha.

But anyway on a eggciting note, BELLY IS BACK TODAY!!!!! Not shureee exactly what time but he's like 1 car park away. So nvm lah I'll head over when he calls. Hehe.

And..Saturday is approaching and I feel extremely nervous and dreadful. Like the anticipation for incessant questions bout results/studies/future is not exactly what I'm looking forward to at 10am in the morning. Deep down I know I'll have to face it somehow and although it's not really a big deal (to me), it just kinda sucks when people are so hard up bout scrutinizing the tiniest detail bout the whole process when you're ready to move on. It' like stfu c'mon mannnnn can we talk bout smth else?? I h8 having to receive comments that come with a hint of pity like "Ohh...never mind la...", yknow, stuff like that. I know how much effort I've put in and I certainly don't need you to decipher (note: assume) my attitude towards it and self-invitingly "comfort" me. Or perhaps I'm just over-analyzing things like I always do. Maybe everyone will be too tired/smoked out by the incense that they'll lay off the topic. Or...maybe to them it's almost customary to talk bout it cuz if not there'll be nth to talk bout?

URGHHHH nvm I'll jst suck it up and get it over and done with. At most I'll just teh gong and buang all questions all the way! HahaHaHaA.