CLEAN

In today's recommended list of books, you have the following:

- How Did My Room Get To Be So Chaotically Messy?
- The Great Clean Up: A lazy person's guide to clean up your room (and hopefully your life)
- Organizing for Dummies

Good luck to me?

BLUBBERBUTT

The highlight of my Sunday night. That, along with a video of Benedict Cumberbatch progressively butchering the pronunciation of "penguin" in a documentary.

Yeah, Sunday's a wild one for me. WILD.

Everything will be alright.

x

GIGGLES

Almost choked to death on my own saliva earlier today whilst on the bus because I was trying to hold back my laughter while listening to The Fighter & The Kid podcast. Brendan Schaub has absolutely no chill when it comes to dishing out the funny.

(talking about Bryan Callen's 3 years old son who apparently cries a lot)

Schaub: ...no no no. Kids do cry, yours cry all the time.
Callen: But he's not even 3 yet!
Schaub: He cries non-stop. I chewed into an apple once and he started crying because of the crunching noise. I mean, could you have a bigger pussy for a kid? Can we be honest here? I bit into an apple and he started crying!

*Callen screaming in the background trying to defend his kid*

Schaub: He said the crunching noise hurts his ears! Oh fuck off little Callen. Go...fuck off!
Callen: No no! He was like, "Wait! I want an apple, the big giant is taking my apple". That's what he was saying.
Schaub: No, there's a shit load of apples. I bit into one and he starts crying. Oh go fuck yourself little Callen.
Callen: This is Brendan at 30 dealing with a 2.5 year old - you are not getting any food, and you are not getting a toy. I'm keeping the ball  for myself, and I'm eating this apple. Shame on you.
Schaub: Well no, there's a shit load of apples but he's crying because I bit into the apple. Bro, come on! And he had no pants on? *sounds even more incredulous* He had no pants on? It was awkward man, it was awkward.
Callen: ...yeah. Well, he doesn't believe in pants.
Schaub: Doesn't believe in pants? Hahahaha!
.
.
.
Schaub: Your kid sucks.

LOLOLOL. The giggles from this podcast are endless.

Aside from almost choking to death, most of my weekend have been spent fighting off the drowsiness that comes with the second (different) bottle of cough syrup that the doctor has prescribed for me - mostly because the first bottle did little to alleviate my image as a potential TB patient. Also, going back to seek for a second consultation in less than 2 days and asking for "antibiotics and a stronger cough syrup because the previous one did nothing" mightttt have insinuated something about the doctor's medicine-prescription skills because boy did he up the ante on his medicine game. His goal might be to render me unconscious throughout the weekend as payback for insulting his medicine-prescription skills because the drowsiness is strong with the second bottle. Well, either that or he just thought that I needed more bed rest. It was probably the latter, but where's the fun in not vilifying your friendly neighbourhood GP?

If you can't already tell, this entire post was written whilst trying to fight off the new cough syrup's drowsiness.

x

CAR DOOR

Ten minutes before knock-off time and the skies decided to throw a little thunderstorm party for the entire East side of Singapore. This piece of detail is not particularly crucial to the story I'm about to tell but just keep that at the back of your mind nonetheless.

Weather: Raining atrociously heavily
Time: Knock-off time
Overall mood: Joey in that one Friends' episode where he just wants to leave Thanksgiving dinner with the gang (the one where Rachel made traditional English trifle with meat and jam and ladyfingers) to go to a drunken party with his hot model roommate and her friends.

 

Except mine was more along the lines of I wanna gooooo...sit in my colleague's car because he has kindly offered to send me home.

Because I have an uncontrollable need to reduce the amount of inconvenience I cause to others as to as low as possible whenever I accept their help, I have already mapped out in about 2.5 seconds how I would run from the door to the car and open the car door to the passenger's seat in as little time as possible.

That's 2.5 seconds more than required to think about such a move because I obviously over-hyped myself when I ran towards the car, opened the car door as swiftly as possible, stuck my massive head out TOWARDS the car door in hopes of shaving off milliseconds only to throw it against the corner of the car door. I, a 22 year old, ran my head against the corner of the car door as I was opening it. The pain was just...umfff *grits teeth*. Let's just say that I was very close to tears.

There is no denying that I run into a lot of inanimate objects. The roofs of low ceiling buses, low hanging air-conditioning outlets of buses, table corners, wall corners (sometimes my brain would think that cutting a sharp corner even more sharply is a good idea), bus doors (a recent experience which caused my ears to bear the brunt of it)...you get the drift. But a self-inflicted car door injury to the forehead is truly a first.

I was terribly afraid that the impact would have caused a cut on my face (it did not) and was relieved for a moment before I realise that it had left a dent in my forehead instead. Literally. Now, 30 minutes after the incident and the dent has been coloured over by a patch of red/angry looking mark which I presume is in the shape of the car door's corner. Because nothing is more attractive than an angry red mark in the middle of my massive forehead.

What can I say, my lack of sense of coordination knows no bounds. Also, I hope to god this mark doesn't turn into a massive bruise tomorrow because guess what's even more attractive than an angry red mark?

SIGH

COMPILE

This is a compilation of slightly more upbeat drafts that I have sitting in the depths of my half-assed pile of incomplete posts which I have accumulated during the short hiatus I took. Throughout this break I would often find myself wandering back here, trying to find a familiar sense of comfort and solace that this space used to provide in exchange for word vomit and frustration filled rants. But those posts would often end in naught. I guess in hindsight the problems that I was dealing with weren't as significant as I thought they were, but in that moment I just felt that if I refrained from talking about it long enough, perhaps it would all go away. Talking about it almost makes it...real, if that makes any sense. 

But that's hindsight for you. Problems in life would always seem less significant as time goes by because you eventually get over them and move on with your life...or learn how to live with the feeling of helplessness and distraught to best of your ability, lolol. But my point is, you eventually learn how to cope. And a good coping mechanism is all I need before I reach the breaking point of The Prince of Darkness vs. The Ocean.

So yes, a step-by-step process of how I deal with problems:

1. Mope around in isolation for as long as I can.

2. Mildly entertain the idea that I might actually be able to get over things while throwing myself a pity party.

3. Eventually running out of fucks to give, which then turns into anger directed at myself for being bummed out for so long.

4. An explosion of rage-filled expletives, followed by getting rid of everything and anything that reminds me of the problem. ("Fuck off! Fuck off!)

5. Gets over the problem entirely and mentally delete any relevant associations of the problem from my mind. ("You fucking asshole ocean.")

 

Although the last step might require a certain level of natural born forgetfulness and abhorrence towards melancholy, I'd say that this solution works well for a solid 37% of the time.

By the way, Ozzy Osbourne calling the open waters a "fucking asshole ocean"? Spectacular.

31 August, 2014

A 4-part story of how I take photos with other people.

1) A last minute "am I looking at right place?" (aka can you point out where I am supposed to look at?)

2) *singular proper photo*

3) "is this angle attractive?" or "does this do anything positive to my jawline?"

4) TEETH

The above photos were taken at a friend's wedding which I attended together with the best friend, who of course looks on point in every photo. The night ended with us hitching a ride from the Navy base's shuttle bus (because the exact directions given to us was "just walk towards the lights and ask the cute guard post guys about the shuttle bus"), deciding between Swee Choon and Harry's, and ending up at Harry's because it was nearer and the struggle with our heels was getting real.

We ended the night with burgers and pasta with a huge side of fries because we didn't eat enough at the wedding. Sartorial restrictions y'all, sartorial restrictions.

2 September, 2014

Period cramps. Bloody period cramps. (hehehe)

The entire day was spent in a state of extreme grumpiness and a constant self-questioning of whether it will be less painful to trade in a full day of period cramps for a single body kick. I was initially considering an above the shoulder hit but lets be honest, I'm probably too vain for that shit.

Side note: My constantly depleting Mandarin proficiency coupled with a lack of motivation to read full pages of Chinese websites' write ups have proven to be a big impediment to my Taiwan travel research. As if I don't struggle enough when it comes to 简体 characters but now I have to read 繁体? 

.........*screams into a pillow*

30 September, 2014

1/50+ photos that I took when I went hiking in Taroko Gorge almost 3 weeks ago, because the best way to start off any vacation is to send a hiking noob struggling through the mountains of Hualien. But that view though! It was almost worth the 3 shades darker I got, which I am fervently trying to fade because I really can't rock a tan to save my life. Aside from not learning anything from the hike, the smart ass me then proceeded to go trekking through 阳明山 in Taipei a few days later in a floral wrap skirt and some dirty converses.

 

Umm...yeah, I really don't have an excuse for my atrociously inappropriate outfit.

Since I'm too lazy to upload all the photos from the trip, I have resigned myself to sitting in front of the laptop and typing out this sub-par post instead, while listening to Stefan Struve's interview on the MMA hour podcast.

Guess whose favourite heavyweight is coming back on 13 December with a fight with Overeem?

OH YEAH.

Now for the important question, is anyone interested in gifting me with a trip to Phoenix, Arizona this coming December 13?

I know I'm all over the place with this post but since we are on the topic of MMA, but allow me to go on a little rant about weigh-in etiquette. (side note: Stefan has great weigh-in etiquette)

I don't usually watch weigh-ins often but when I do, nothing annoys me more than a fighter coming out in what looks to be every single article of clothing in their closet. Uh...did you not know that you have to strip down for your weigh-in? Or have you decided to channel your inner Dita Von Teese that day? I get that you might be trying to sweat out the last couple of pounds of water weight but really, can't you keep that backstage and just come out in the most expedite-the-weigh-ins-outfit you can manage?

And as if watching a fighter walk out to weigh-ins clothed in layers isn't annoying enough, there's also the impromptu Magic Mike show that some of them put on.

I'm not talking about the let-me-drop-these-clothes-in-a-neat-pile-over-here types. I'm talking about the all out, let-me-redecorate-the-entire-stage-in-my-clothes jazz show that certain fighters do - completed with the grand finale: watch me throw my clothes as far away as possible so that my team mate, who is standing next to me, can scramble to pick them up.

WTF. If your team mate is standing right there beside you, there is absolutely no reason for you to be throwing your clothes in the opposite direction because you can either,

1) hand your clothes over to your team mate politely,
2) drop your clothes neatly into a pile near your team mate so as not to inconvenience them, or just
3) PICK UP AFTER YOUR DAMN SELF CAUSE YOU ARE A GROWN ASS ADULT.

13 November, 2014

Finally got my ass around to listening to The Fighter & The Kid podcast and...

.

.

.

.

.

...I'm going to just let this photo convey the nature and content of the podcast instead of trying to explain it.

IT'S TIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMEE for everyone to go download and listen to this podcast because this shit is amazing and fucking hilarious.

---

So yup, this concludes the end of my compilation. And hopefully the start of more frequent posting because I really do enjoy writing in this space quite a bit.

-

This is a reminder to myself that this is not permanent.

FIFTY

Came across an article that made me go...

Apparently there is a anti-pornography organisation in Washington that is attacking the upcoming movie, Fifty Shades of Grey (in case you have been living under a rock, it is a popular erotic novel centered around BDSM).

This is a little quote from them:

 "With the popularity of this book, mainstream opinion-makers (like Oprah, the Today Show and Broadway) are telling the public (especially youth) that humiliation, degradation and torture in sex is normal and to just give it a try."

....what? 

First off, who defines the normality of sex anyway? What people choose to do in the privacy (or not, if you are into that) of their bedrooms is none of your business. They do not need to adhere to your standards of appropriateness, nor is there a need for one. The only thing that is absolutely necessary when it comes to anything remotely sexual, is mutual consent, meeting of the legal age requirement, and using proper protection against sexually transmitted diseases and unwanted pregnancies. What's it to you if someone is into the concept of dominance and subservience? This is a book-based movie acted out by good looking people about BDSM, not some donkey fucking tradition. So sit your asses (lolol) down and chill the fuck out.

Secondly, I'm pretty sure no one in the mainstream media, especially Oprah, is actually explicitly telling the youth of the world to give BDSM a try. Doing a promotional media stint is not equivalent to sending everyone home with a care package filled with latex and whips while screaming "You get a BDSM package! You get a BDSM package! And you get a BDSM package!".

Thirdly, if they truly want to attack the movie, it should be because it is based off a shitty book and shitty books should not be made into movies (*cough* twilight *cough*). Side tracking a little, I have tried (and failed) on multiple occasions to sit through an entire Twilight movie. I just can't. The bland dialogue, the even blander acting, and the fact that it is based on an extremely stupid premise that feeds off young girls' puberty struggles and low self-esteem by creating an extremely vague and average, a one-size fits all character for 15 year old girls to live vicariously through. Add in a 17 year old looking centenarian whose sole purpose in life seems to be to protect and feed as much attention as possible to the girl...and a worldwide phenomenon is created. Fifty Shades of Grey is just the adult version of Twilight. It plays into the bedroom struggles of adults while providing a literary escape for the those who wouldn't mind a handsome, wealthy businessman with a bad boy edge to sweep them off their feet and satisfy their libido. This is what both the Twilight and Fifty Shades of Grey books are: Unchallenging, uninspiring, contains little to no educational value piece of sorry ass literature that somehow, manages to get published and made into movies.

So don't protest against sexually explicit movies. Protest against shitty stories that are written into multiple books, which will then be made into multiple movies, which will then haunt the cinema screens worldwide for years to come.

JJ LIN

Just finished watching Eastern Promises, a 2007 film (very dope, although I wished that it was 30 minutes longer) about the lesser known but much more fearsome Russian Mafia.

Which then led me to sit through a 90-minute long documentary called Thieves by Law, or Vory V Zakone in Russian. The documentary isn't all that revealing about the history and background of the Russian Mafia and how they run their operations, but it does give you a slight peek into the psyche of some of the mobsters.

But this isn't the point of the post.

At the 27-minute mark of the documentary, the video cuts to show a man named Edik, who happens to be one of Vitaly Dymochka's henchman. Side note, Dymochka is a Russian mobster and crime boss...as well as a writer/director/producer of a short TV series called Spets. The TV show was created out of Vitaly's displeasure towards how organized crime was portrayed on television, so he shelled out money from his own pocket to shoot a seven part series which aims to educate viewers about the reality of the Russian underworld.

Good to know that someone is finally doing something to raise awareness about the misrepresentation of Russian mobsters in today's film and television

But back to Edik the henchman. 27 minutes in, the documentary shows Edik eating some soup, and then his phone rings. And then my jaw pretty much fell to the fucking ground. Because some henchman living in Ussuriysk, Russia, which by the way, is 8922km away from Moscow, has JJ Lin's 曹操 as his fucking ringtone. I'm not motivated enough to google the lyrics to the song, but I'm pretty sure the chorus goes something like "blah blah blah blah, 分三国, blah blah blah blah blah blaaaah blaaah". Each blah corresponds with what I remember the lyrics to be like, because I'll have you know that I was quite the JJ Lin fan back when I was 15. But I digress.

By the close to impossible chance that JJ Lin is reading this, I would like to say the following to him.

Dear JJ, I would like you to know that the multitude of musical accolades you have sitting at home mean nothing. The plentiful nominations and long ass articles published, all of which sings the praises of your musical talents mean nothing. Even the time when you finally got your way and acted all cutesy on stage with Hebe on a swing with a cup of tau huey zui means nothing.

Click on the documentary, fast forward it to the 27-minute mark, and savour the moment. Save the video, screen cap the moment, frame it, and bask in what would be your eternal glory. This is your one true defining moment. If there was any doubt or hesitation that you or anyone might have towards your musical success, just remind yourself that somewhere out there, a Russian henchman is rocking out to your song before bashing someone's kneecaps in with a baseball bat.

You've made it dude. You really have.

That is, unless the FSB has 舞娘 blasting through their offices la. Hahahahaha.

FUENTES

This is how much my attention span has receded (pun intended, you'll realise soon enough). I'm suppose to collate and refresh a bunch of organic chemistry notes I have sitting in a folder, which really isn't all that much considering it's mostly just copying and pasting things together.

But whaddayaknow. The following is a list of things I have done since embarking on this task, which in hindsight is probably why I'm still not done, but let's go through them nonetheless shall we.

1. Two Joe Rogan podcasts, which are both 3 hours long. So that's a total of 6 hours down the drain and I'm still left with a good 35% to completion.

I say the next point with great sheepishness so try to keep that in mind before judging me.

2. Two big plastic mugs of cheap merlot and...red grape juice mixed together. Now, I'm pretty sure this information is enough to anger some dead french wine connoisseur somewhere so much that he comes back to life, flies over, stuffs me in a wine barrel and proceeds to kick-roll me through a vineyard in a quaint french countryside so that my screams for help cannot be heard but I have my reasons.

Reason 1: The biggest liquid containing cylinder I had at home happens to be a plastic mug.
Reason 2: I needed wanted to finish up the juice. And the wine. So in my infinite ingenuity, I...

You know what. I'll just climb into the barrel myself.

3. A singular kinder bueno stick. And resisting the urge to finish the other stick.

4. Googled "king tut recreation" because it was mentioned on the podcast and marvelled over the pictures of his side profile. Is this another side effect of years of royal incentuous relationships? Also, can anyone just spell Tutankhamen offhandedly?

5. Listening to metal and post-hardcore music because I thought that the incessant screaming is going to help with my concentration and motivation. That only lasted for about 3 songs in before I googled the lyrics to Hold On Till May, read most of Vic Fuentes' Wikipedia page, and then discovered this gem of a tumblr page because it showed up as a related search.

fuckyeahvicfuentesbaldpatch

This is an entire tumblr page dedicated to Vic's bald spot, which as recommended, should be caressed when presented with the opportunity.

Lolol I literally can't with this tumblr page. A blog solely centered around a ridiculous subject ran by someone with a great sense of humour, along with ridiculously funny anonymous submissions. A prime example:

Is there anything funnier than irrational anger? The giggles from this page are endless.

6. Proceeded to google Marilyn Manson and found out that he would be in the upcoming final season of Sons of Anarchy. Side note, I am very very dreading the end of SoA. The script is great, the acting is impeccable, and the music on the show is one of the best out there as far as television series goes. Kurt Sutter is a genius.

7. This blog post.

It is now 2.23am and the 35% still remains uncompleted. God dammit.

HOLES

Spending my Friday morning aggressively but strategically enlarging the pre-existing holes in my jeans.

Because spending money on clothing that have intentionally made holes just isn't enough waste of money.

I wonder if this is how rockstars spend their Friday mornings.

MEAT

Today marks the 3rd day after my wisdom tooth surgery and I am wide awake at 3.42am after trying to fall asleep since 1am.

I am 100% serious when I say that I want nothing more right now than for the following 5 things.

1) The swelling to go away because right now I look like I permanently have a marble stuck in my right cheek. Or am in an abusive relationship. Or GSP in every fight he has been in because that dude bruises as easily as a very ripe banana.

2) My stitches to be removed. I really, really want them to be removed because shit's annoying as hell. My dentist went to town with them and it makes it impossible to align the top and bottom rows of my teeth comfortably. Or to sleep with my mouth closed through the whole night. Or for me to eat meat because I cannot chew properly/pain-freely.

3) Grilled crabsticks. Those artificial crab meat dyed a potentially poisonous red that financially strained students buy to their bbq gatherings. I very rarely eat them (save for the ones in cheap sushi) but I have been craving grilled crabsticks since a few months ago and that craving has not been satisfied. This has only been amplified during this (gastronomically) trying period.

4) Meat.

5) Meat.

I would fail terribly at all types of vegetarianism. Also, this post is very first world problem worthy.

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*GoT SPOILER ALERT*

(But seriously, The Watchers on the Wall episode aired last week. Just watch it already.)

The episode thoroughly satisfied my Styr obsession, aka tall and huge bald men with a very intimidating presence, preferably with no affiliation to white supremacist gangs. Plus I was very happy with the way he was killed, all in it's bloody and violent glory with a hammer through the head.

Giggity.

This episode is my favourite thus far - how could it not be? It is filled with so many freaking awesome fighting scenes and epic dialogues and CGI goodness.

Side note, this happened.

(Ser Alliser rallying his men moments before the Thenns attacked)

Ser Alliser:  Those are Thenns on our walls, they eat the flesh of the men they kill! Do you want to fill the belly of a Thenn tonight? Tonight we fight!

This was the exact response I had in my mind.

Eh....depends? Do they cook their enemies alive? I really have no qualms with them eating me after I die. Just don't grill me over an open flame when my nervous system is still working. I mean, the men of the Night's Watch aren't exactly waiting to be commemorated for years to come under an artisan made tomb stone/statue right.

(Time check: 5.10am...my mind is very much scrambled so I will just move on. Takeaway point: SUPER AWESOME EPISODE.)

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A short documentary I watched recently about rehydrating corpses for identification purposes.

And an example of my sense of (inappropriate) humour because this has been cracking me up for days after. You best believe that I giggle uncontrollably every time I think about it.

I contributed to the 15.

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My annoyance at my stitches is at it's all time high right now. Bloody balls.

CLACKERS

As I begin to type my first post in a long ass time, I would like start off with a new technological low I have reached. I attempted to do a bluetooth file transfer from my phone to my laptop and the key word here is attempted, because after 3 failed attempts, I gave up and googled "How to transfer files using bluetooth on Samsung Galaxy S4". My technology incompetency knows no limit.

Now, guess who just finished her finals 2 days ago?

(ﾉ≧∀≦)ﾉ Oh yeaaaaaaaaaaaah.

But first, a collage of outfits when I actually do bother to dress up. Because why not.

Can you tell that I like floral prints?

By the way, this is a far (really far) and sad cry from me during finals. The first indication of not bothering would be glasses over contact lenses. Then comes unwashed hair, a random band shirt, worn in jeans, worn in hoodie and a pair of dirty converses. So basically I just aim to look like an even lazier version of a Nirvana groupie.

My idea of making my outfit more presentable for lunch with a friend was to switch out my purple with pink polka dots backpack with a black satchel, and my band shirt+hoodie combination with a sweater. Not the brightest idea by the way, because 95% of the bags in the exam hall were black and the Sun was extremely unforgiving that day.

Speaking of finals, I had time to kill before meeting my mama for dinner after my last paper so I did a little shopping. A sample of my glasses and unwashed jeans combo, together with my very stylish digital baby G watch (examinations are not the best place to risk my analogue reading skills) which I wore when I was in primary school, in a dressing room with nice lighting.

By the way, the jeans in the photo are about 20 days old. As in unwashed for 20 days. Oh yeah, dirty jeans are quite the boy magnet trait...not. And awkward 90's boy band pose because I obviously do not know how to take a proper outfit shot without leaning on something.

Pass me some Christmas lights and I could fit right in.

Uninteresting fact: I ended up buying the shirt in black because I don't already have a gazillion black shirts and I have a problem with colours.

Hmmm, what else. I have quite a number of unfinished posts sitting in my draft folder. They are either half completed rants, half completed UFC fight opinions or random things I find funny. Like how there will always be a part of me expecting a dwarf stripper dressed as a policeman to pop out dancing whenever Marilyn Manson's Tainted Love comes on. I call dibs on Phoebe. And Monica.

I apologize if this post seems to be all over the place. I am rewatching The Devil Wears Prada whilst typing this and let's be honest, my coherence isn't even that great when I am concentrating 100%. Quick random thoughts before I end the post!

1) STEFAN STRUVE IS BACK Y'ALL. UFC 175 is staaaaaacked like Kimye's wedding planner's bank account. Chris Weidman vs Lyoto Machida, Stefan Struve vs Matt Mitrione, Chael Sonnen vs Vitor Belfort, Ronda Rousey vs Alexis Davis, Urijah Faber, Uriah Hall... Please excuse me while I try not to hurl out of excitement.

2) Wisdom tooth removal part 2 coming up. Why do you have to be so impacted, WHY. ლ(ಠ_ಠლ)

3) I might go back and get the shirt in white after all.

4) Game of Thrones is resuming this week so YAAAAAAAS. Let me paint you a little picture of my...enthusiasm towards GoT. I am reading the books, watching the show, and watching 30-60 minutes long episode review videos on Youtube after they air. I also have A Song of Ice and Fire's wiki page bookmarked on my phone, because who doesn't like to read up intensively on each character and browse through galleries of fan art?

5) Hurrrrrr. My hair has reached the length and thickness that makes brushing through it a painful chore. Literally. I should really cut it soon.

So that's all for now. Back to my movie!

HSM

Zac Efron is turning 27 years old this year.
.
.
.
.
.
What do you mean High School Musical was 8 years ago?
.
.
.
.
.
And what do you mean I am 8 years away from turning 30?

Every time I feel like time is passing a little too quickly to my liking, I try to put time in perspective and visualise the reverse. 14 years old to 22 years old seems pretty damn long to me, so maybe time isn't passing by too quickly after all.

Or maybe your twenties are encapsulated in a time vortex and fast forwarded without you knowing. I hope not.

#GoWildCats

The stress of exams can get the better of me on most some days but I'm ever so grateful to the bff who is always on standby to receive my barrage of complaints and calm me down from my ridiculous freak out episodes.

If there's anything I can do well, it's definitely freaking out la.

Taking a little extended break and watching star awards. This is the type of girl gossip that goes on when we watch the same show together.

KEKEKE.

Okay I shall get back to whatever I need to do right now. Hopefully this filler post wasn't too meh. Meeeeeeehhhhh.

THENNS

I don't usually have songs stuck in my head. Okay that is a lie, but they don't usually last for days and remain insatiable despite being put on loop for the entire week. I wake up with this song in my head and find myself humming its tune incessantly throughout the day. My obsession with this song is getting a little out of hand.

Perhaps it's the excitement of discovering another awesome indie rock band. Or the appeal of tattooed boys. Or all of the above wrapped up in that voice. It's mostly his voice. Which is why I couldn't decide between both versions.

Please listen to either one of the videos before you scoff at the song title because it reminds you of the barrage of Youtube videos about girls obsessed with pumpkin spice lattes.

And since we are on the topic of obsession, I am filled with guilt every time I walk pass my bookshelf and see my incomplete A Song of Ice and Fire collection. And my 3/4 read A Clash of Kings. The new season of Game of Thrones has just started and I still haven't caught up on my readings. Yikes. All I want is for my show watching to be in tandem with my book reading...aaaand I have never been cooler. I initially wanted to hold out until finals are over before watching GoT but I couldn't resist and gave in to the first episode. I know that the panties are mostly dropping for popular characters like Jon Snow/Robb Stark/Daario Naharis(eh...still feeling kinda meh about the new one) and whichever good looking character there is but god damn Styr, Magnar of Thenn.

Shaved head, bleached eyebrows, scarred face and cannibalism. IS THERE ANYTHING MANLIER.

(or hotter)

(!!!)

Please don't kill him off too soon.

Onto random questions! Caught an old Friends episode where Rachel gives birth to Emma and it reminded me of the same question that pops into my mind whenever I watch child birthing scenes.

WHERE DO THEY GET THE BABIES FROM.

I'd like to think that those are older babies and not newborns but some are just too...fresh looking (aka red and wrinkly) to be an older baby. Is there actually a list of newborns on standby to cast in these scenes? Or is that just an extremely lifelike doll? And what do they use to cover the babies (assuming they are humans and not dolls) when they present them in blood and placenta? 

The whole idea of casting newborns as newborns and parents who willingly sign up their newborns for an acting job is just...very creepy.

Also, newborns could easily be the name for some underground hipster brand for shoes. Sounds cooler than New Balance anyway. Newborns Air. Newborns Zero. Newborn X. Very befitting, yes?

Okay, I shall end this post lest I say anything more random. Or weird. I am literally on the verge of an emotional implosion from studying for finals. /bangs head on table

SOFIA

This is my morning routine: Browsing TYT /VICE, catching up on mostly depressing but occasionally uplifting news, and then jumping over to a website that scrutinises body image.

Scrolling through photos of a 20 year old Sofia Vergara who just gave birth 4 months prior and thinking...HOLY DAMN. She looks amazing now at 42 but god damn a 20 year old Sofia is just hotness on a whole other level. Another planet out of the world other level.

Also, I like reading through the comments because sometimes you'll get this one troll who goes...

Troll: Perfect? She has no curves, she looks angular and bones are sticking out. and her legs tapered straight down, no muscularity there. I assure you, the perfect female figure does not resemble a 12 year old boy.

Who then gets shot down by an incredibly funny comeback.

Comeback: I can assure you as someone that used to be a 12 year old boy I never looked like a 20 year old Sofia Vergra.

For reference, this is what blessed genetics look like.

I think this deserves another wowza. Excuse me while I go pick up my fallen jaw once again. Along with my self esteem.

Right now I can safely say that I for sure forgot the point I was trying to get to in this post so I shall get back to my financial reporting revision instead.

I feel like a prime number (apart from 2) right now because I can't even.

Hehehehehe. (that's really the embodiment of my sense of humour right there)

UNF

Soooooo Kim Jong Un wants every North Korean man to sport the same haircut as him. He kinda has this...hipster/I-am-going-through-something/DIY/I-saw-that-in-a-Mr. Bean-episode-once thing going on.

Like this.

But that's not the point. I was reading the Times article that the bff sent me and browsing through the comments when I came across this.

Guy: I kind of want a socialist chic haircut.

It wasn't anything spectacularly hilarious, but a reply from a girl just made the whole thing golden.

Girl: It'll make you look like Kim Jong-UNF

HAHAHAHAHAHA. GENIUS. PURE GENIUS. It takes skill to deliver tasteful flirtation with a side of wittiness, both of which I know nothing of because my flirtatious side takes after Jon Snow. 

Oh! I downloaded SoundCloud recently because it seems to be the most idiot-proof music app for someone inept in the face of anything modern. Found a CHVRCHES  cover of Arctic Monkeys' Do I Wanna Know and it is absolutely amazing. 

This app is pretty neat when it comes to discovering new music. Plus, I can now confirm that my appreciation for anything made by someone whose occupation is listed as a DJ is very relative. At a party/club-like setting? Okay. Any other day? Not so much. My face just turns into a mush like I've smelt something bad because I cannot stand it.

My life will continue to be anchored around revision and mugging and more revision and exasperation and tears and more mugging for the next 2 months.

I am thoroughly filled with excitement that rivals someone being held captive in a North Korean dungeon.

Side note: I changed my profile picture because the previous one was almost 2 years old. It looks passable la hor my selfie game wasn't too shabby that day.../cough/humble brag/cough. And! The heat and humidity recently! *shakes fist* I was checking the weather last night and the humidity was 89%. What the actual fuck. Makes me want to silently weep in a corner every year when the humidity decides gets ridiculous. But I can't. Because damn you humidity!

RANT...ish

Watching a National Geographic show called "Men With Many Wives ( Aka Meet The Polygamists)" and I have to let this anger out somewhere.

Blood boiling does not even start to describe the wrath I feel towards polygamy. Especially polygamy justified on the grounds of religion. 1 man, 3 wives, 22 children and your eldest daughter who is only 18 years old have been "praying for over 2 years to God for a name or a sign of who I should marry", or something along those lines because I couldn't concentrate over the ringing of my bullshit alarm.

"In our faith...", no. Not your faith. Not your askewed religion that promotes polygamy. Not anything spiritual. No. The secular concept of polygamy is just another manifestation of the inherent selfish nature of humans, which I could give less fucks about if that is what you want. But using religion or faith as a ground to back your choice of polygamy? No. That is nothing more than a man made (literally) manipulative concept constructed to satiate your selfish desire for fucking multiple women, rationalised under the cloak of religion. Oh yeah and while you are at it, why not marry them too because your big ego couldn't stand the thought of them being with other men. The whole concept of justifying your wants using religion is stupid and cowardice. Using it as an excuse does not make it anymore socially accepting or morally rightous. Just admit that you enjoy having multiple wives because it satisfies your self-serving interests. Admit that you are willing to go against societal norms in exchange for the chance to practice your blatent disregard for self control. Most animals don't practice polygamy anyway! Just don't put yourself on an elevated ground as if you have got no choice because you are following your faith or whatever your religion wants you to do. Nobody asked you to do shit. Your uncontrollable libido and lack of restraint on the other hand? More likely.

Ooooh you have no idea how much I wanted to tell off the guy who complained about the hard graft he had to do to maintain financial stability and providing for his family of 3 wives and 7 kids. Just stick to the winning formula of raging hormonal frat boys: Condoms and easy girls. Don't go around marrying multiple people and start popping out kids irresponsibly if you know your sorry ass can't afford it.

Side note: Graft. My unhealthy relationship with trashy reality television in its latest form  - Geordie Shore. I am very much ashamed.

My thoughts are now scrambled after mentioning Geordie Shore. Just how low can a neckline go before its t-shirt/tank top card gets revoked? Double U necklines are almost an entry requirement for the boys. Not kidding.

Err...okay, very abrupt ending now because by scrambled I really meant disappear. Hahaha. Light ending to an angry rant?

171

UFC 171 recap + a bunch of random stuff. Actually, I only managed to catch the last 2 fights so this is more like 2/9 of a recap. Also, my memory is shit so this is a summary of two-ninths of a summary.

Carlos Condit vs Tyrone Woodley

Carlos is probably one of the best looking fighters out there. But then again my perception isn't exactly mainstream so it might be debatable. And Woodley...wa piang Tyrone Woodley is a walking block of muscle la. A block of pure, dense, packed muscle. Have you seen his legs? Those quads are fucking unreal. Onto the fight!

Carlos ate 2 right ones straight off the bat, followed by takedowns by Woodley with Carlos' leg tucked in. Does my description make sense? Anyhow, I feel like that might have something to do with popping his knee later on. Ended the first round with a closely missed spinning back elbow from Woodley. A takedown into the second round later annnnnnd Carlos' knee/ACL/something in that knee area snapped. Tyrone kicked his left knee but his right knee gave out instead when he tried to land on it.

 

Weird takedown/knee

You can almost hear the heartbreaks in the crowds because everyone was rooting for Condit to win and nobody saw that coming la. SIGH. Can they label the fight "TKO (real talk it's just a really unfortunate knee injury so can we scrape this?)" instead of just TKO (leg injury) ? In the words of teenage boy lingo...shag. :(

Fight ended with a childish cameraman obstinately refusing to pan to Nick Diaz who was sitting beside Ronda Rousey, despite her leaning into and pointing towards him. In related Diaz brothers news, Nate Diaz and his #wackasshendrix hashtag on twitter. I loled.

Johny Hendricks vs Robbie Lawler

Home ground for Johny!

First round: A good combination of punches + knee early on by Lawler. Then let the clinch/lame takedowns ensue. Hendricks attempted several times but Lawler's takedown defense was super on point. Hendricks putting in the grind for the leg kicks.

Second round: Hendricks switched it up and threw a barrage of jabs/punches/kicks/knees.

Third + Fourth round: Lawler is on fire and his boxing game was strong as hell. Huge uppercut that boggled Hendricks' marbles for a bit. Hendricks was eating punches left right before he decided to dish some of it back but Lawler just took them all in with a smile on his face.

Fifth round: Leg kicks starting to pay off and Hendricks amps it up. Lawler ate a huge left hand from Hendricks followed by impeccable combination thrown + a leg kick and finished off with a (semi-successful?) takedown. Best takedown of all 5 rounds at least. Lawler shakes his head in disappointment when he saw that there is only 40 seconds left on the clock and Hendricks is still sitting on his clinched ass.

 

Result: Johny Hendricks is the new welterweight champion! Yaaaaaaasssss!

Side note: Someone in Lawler's camp had to take off their shirt because they couldn't find Robbie's original walkout shirt. What. Err...okay.

Side side note: Lawler has 烈 and 刑 tattooed on his body. Took me about 2.5 rounds to figure out these two Chinese characters because my proficiency in the language is only relevant when 1) I speak it and,

2) there are other Chinese characters beside it to refer and interpret from. Like if it was 酷刑, the 刑 would be easier for me to recognise. Having said that, all I can think of now is 烈奶. Lie4 nai3 means condensed milk right? Or is that a different lie4? 

Displaying my significantly worsened grasp of the Chinese language. Always a good way to end an incoherent post.

Following the incoherence, I haven't had a haircut in forever and my ponytails/buns are giving me a headache if I put my hair up for too long. Actually, the headaches could also just be the immediate effect of reading notes. Post-structuralism can go fuck itself.

--
Arthur: We shouldn't get married... we have nothing in common. You love horses. I don't trust them. Their shoes are permanent. Who makes that kind of a commitment to a shoe?

Touche Arthur, touche.

TWO

Two things I had to google this week because my internet lingo game is weak.

1. Bae/babs.

My contempt for these two terms endearment knows no bounds. When I see babs, all I can think of is that it's a shortened version of Barbara. And then an image of Barbara Walters would promptly appear...which of course as everyone knows, is the univesal image for proclaiming your love to your partner. Also, I feel like you need to be rolling deep in stacks of cash and flashy gold chains (plus appropriately owning a set of dimond grills) to be able to pull off "bae" without sounding stupid.

2. #wcw

Apparently it means "women crush Wednesday". I say apparently, because the first search result displayed on Google was "World Championship Wrestling", which I thought was some kind of new cruel term to mock fat people. It didn't make any sense to me because in which universe would Rihanna ever be considered fat? Following the theme of obscure acronyms, I also had to google #tbt and #ff sometime ago, which means "throwback Thursday" "follow Friday" respectively.

Sooooo...assigning specific events to individual weekdays is a thing now.

Few questions though: Is there a list of events that corresponds with every weekday? Are weekends included? Can the T in #tbt represent Tuesday also? Why the need for so many pointless and ridiculous acronyms?

The point is. I am very annoyed at pictures with a barrage of useless hashtags la.

The trigger point for this rant, if anyone is interested, is a picture with 22 hashtags. Twenty fucking two. I'm not on instagram often enough to know what the acceptable number of hashtags are, but 22 different labels on a social networking site that works on the basis of photo sharing seems like an overkill for self-validation to me.

A sample of the 22:

What. I can't even.

I hope that I'm not being some kind of hashtag prude and that this a legit annoyance. Or maybe I am, because hashtag prude would almost seem like a natural progression for internet lingo loser. Lolol.

Side note: This is probably the most times I have used # in a single sitting. More than when I try to update my shipping address and the Forever 21 website repeatedly crashes to erase everything that I have just typed.

I am not in the best of moods lately.

READ

"...the need for survival requires state leaders to distance themselves from traditional morality, which attaches a positive value to caution, piety, and the greater good of humankind as a whole. Machiavelli argued that these principles were positively harmful if adhered to by the state leaders. It was imperative that state leaders learned a different kind of morality, not accorded with traditional Christian virtues but with political necessity and prudence."

Catching up on my readings, which is under the heading of "The timeless wisdom of Realism". I have my reservations over the words "timeless" and "wisdom". That, coupled with live updates on Crimea and yet another fun video of condoned violence against Pussy Riot in Russia makes for a really positive Saturday thus far. Not.

All I want to do is just browsing through JDS's instagram and look at his stinking cute face la.
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And his hot damn body, because who am I kidding, hahaha.

Time check: 10.03pm
Taking a break from revision and watching Case 39 on television. Never realised that Renee Zellweger's voice is actually quite annoying. 10.07pm now. Pretty sure that the kid will turn out to be some psychotic demon killer.

Time check: 12.22am
Okay demon child prediction was right. Whelp, there goes my sleep tonight. Can't a girl have some good old fashion demon in normal demon form and not some sadistic indestructible kid?

Time check: 2.57am
Readings are getting progressively harder to complete. Mostly because they leave me in a languid state of depression. Is there anything remotely uplifting about International Relations? I think not. Also, the smell of haze is growing prominent *shakes fist at Sumatra*. I foresee the commencement of the ever popular game amongst the serial complainists - blame the government (or has it already started?). Lol. To them I say, please read this. It is always easier to complain anyway.

Time check: 3.19am
It's approximately 40 minutes to mac's breakfast. An eternal temptation ever since I started studying through the night. I have been successful at abstaining from it so far, but hunger weakens the will and nothing good ever happens past 2am. Especially when it comes to food choices.

I wonder what is going through Gustafsson and Manuwa's minds right now. Definitely a solid match up and a really tough fight to call. EEEEEEEEK! (thats my squeal of excitement). Also, one more week to Hendricks vs Lawler! More squeals of excitement.

-

Okay this post is getting too incoherent and long and boring.

505

Stop and wait a sec,
When you look at me like that my darling what did you expect,
I'd probably still adore you with your hands around my neck,
Or I did last time I checked

Not shy of a spark,
The knife twists at the thought that I should fall short of the mark,
Frightened by the bite though it's no harsher than the bark,
Middle of adventure, such a perfect place to start

A little old school monkeys because I have listened to AM to its absolute bones and I am less than 10 loops away from hating it.

Sike.

It is impossible to hate anything from this band, although Don't Sit Down Cause I've Moved Your Chair does come close.

Miles and Jamie though. And Matt. And Nick. And motherfucking Alex. So basically everyone in the video.

By the way, I have most definitely exceeded my 15-minutes long study break.

There is a reason for me being awake at this ungodly hour though, I have recently grown accustomed to studying through the night. Not quite sure if it's the brightest move body clock wise. The cup of coffee I had at 12am would probably concur.

I have a lot on my mind recently with little intention to share them. +5 cryptic points to me. Mostly because they are tiresome (or for one, infuriating) issues which I know the solution to and repeating them in detail would only serve to 1) waste my time and 2) waste other people's time. Also, I am always partial to the option of escapism when presented with one.

Feeling melancholic. Always a great way to end a grossly extended study break.

*always fun to realise a lyrical error after posting the entry.

170

UFC 170 just ended and I'll probably do a pointless recap whenever I get around doing that but just two things for now:

1. There is no better way to lose than being a jerk with a loose mouth and riling a 205-pounds Daniel Cormier up. Also, angry fights are the best fights (Yay Rory!).

2. Liver shots and Sara Mcmann's impecabble manners. Seriously, girl's got some serious manners. I foresee Herb Dean getting more shit for premature fight stoppage coming off the Faber incident, but this was a just decision la. Ronda Rousey was clearly out to shred Sara's liver using her knees and she did dropped her so it was stoppage in the interest of preventing further unecessary damage.

Eh what else...2 Fight Nights to look forward to before 171: Hendricks vs Lawler for the new welterweight champion. And then Shogun vs Hendo 2 and 172: Jones vs Teixeira, which of course includes Ellenberger (Y U BAIL ON SG) vs Saffiedine (leg kicks and a penchant to slowly chip his opponents away with pain).

Met the bff yesterday and had my wittiest (self proclaimed) moment to date. Backstory: I ordered a veal sausauge sandwich and we were talking about why the meat of young cattles were called veal instead of beef.

G: Why call it veal anyway. There is no different name for the meat of other young animals what. What do you call the meat of a young chicken anyway?
Me: ...eggs?

KEKEKEKEKE.

Question: What is the difference between yogurt and frozen yogurt apart from the state of matter?

Bonus question: Why can't I get thin mints flavoured creamer anywhere? Grace Helbig makes it sound like liquid happiness in a bottle and all I want is just for my morning coffee to be happy god dammit is that too much to ask for?!

But seriously please let me know where I can get thin mints flavoured creamer. Or just peppermint flavoured.

Coconut is fine too I like coconuts.

This post has derailed for far too long.

SIGH

GIRLS. Girls girls girls. This might be the only cable show that I have to hold off till I am emotionally stable enough to handle the stark realization that comes with the realistic (although slightly heightened) portrayal of internal turmoil and life drama amongst everything and anything in the form of HD television.

Also, Fight Night 36. Not gonna lie, I fell asleep on the sofa right after watching Oliveria triangle choked the shit out of Andy Ogle, which eerily illustrates the struggle I have gaining control over my life recently + my reaction to a relatively new piece of information I have come to know about. I had initially planned on watching Machida vs Mousasi live but I guess that'll have to happen...whenever I get my ass around downloading the entire event. But Machida won! So that's great news. Next event to look forward to would be UFC 170. Rousey vs McMann, Cormier vs Cummins, Mcdonald vs Maia, Whittaker vs Thompson...I feel like I missed out on a fight but I am too lazy to find out. Oh! Nurmagomedov was supposed to fight initially but...fight got cancelled. A bit of a let down since his fights are always so freaking exciting to watch. What else. Hmmm, read this piece of news sometime ago about Overeem saying that he is not afraid of fighting JDS but instead is always held back by suspiciously timed injuries. Eh...

...yea, sure, whatever you say dude.

Spent Valentine's Day the best way possible with the bff at our favourite restaurant and some light (okay maybe not so light) shopping. Ended the day with the conclusion that our tolerance for staying out (actively) is slowly decreasing to an embarrassing level, which is not good if it is any indication of our embarkation into our twenties. Or maybe that is just applicable to me. I tend to favour living vicariously through others.

Something slightly fun happened during IR this past weekend. The lecturer, whilst wasting the first 30 minutes of class away doing absolutely nothing, had to pick up an incoming phone call. To which he answered, "Eh sorry I am not free today, busy teaching a class.". Imagine the incredulous looks on all of our faces - before the guys next to me exclaimed "What the fuck is he talking about. Teach simi?" and I laughed out loud. It's a you have to be there to understand kind of situation.

Ending this abruptly because I can feel a slight annoyance boiling and I might actually post something I end up regretting so...that's all for now.

PEPPERS

Me: Eh when is Valentine's Day ah? 7th or 12th?
Hui: ...14th.

At least I got one multiple right. My memory is not the best but I remotely remember reading about some Valentine's Day tragedy in some kids' nerd magazine (Smarties?? Smarty's?? I have no idea what the damn thing was called but this kept popping into my mind. There's always a cartoon boy wearing thick black rimmed glasses hanging out with his friends though...or is that Doremon? Told ya about my memory.). ANYWAY back to my story, the tragedy was about a school fire that took place on Valentine's Day during a school dance, which resulted in a lot of students burning to death. So that has always been my knowledge of the Valentine's Day tragedy. Until I decided to google "Valentine's Day massacre" and found out that the official Saint Valentine's Day massacre was not a tragic school dance completed with burning children but an Italian gang shoot-out that resulted in 7 deaths instead. So where and why the heck did I have that memory in my mind?! I tried to google for stories about the school fire but there was nothing. Perhaps I was using the wrong keywords, but my search history now has "school fire valentine's day", "valentine's day massacre school", "school dance fire", and a few other similar variations. I might have accidentally flagged myself as a potential sadistic arsonist in my attempt to validate my twisted childhood memory.

By the way, I started on this post wanting to complain about how ridiculously expensive flowers are because I came across a website selling flowers and a 35% impressive looking bouquet of roses will set you back approximately $200. And this is coming from someone who has low standards on bouquet-impressiveness. Wtf I know flowers are not cheap but I never knew they were so exorbitantly priced! As much as I would like to give in to the romanticized notion that flowers are the "most beautiful waste of money"... I just can't. Spending money on a bunch of clipped off reproductive parts of plants is something I will continually struggle to come to terms with because it is such a ridiculous waste of money but ERMAGERD Y SO PRETTY LOOKING. The bulk of my tumblr posts are probably ranked like this: Flowers, cats, band boys (can a 51 year old Anthony Kiedis be called a band boy still?), funny (to me) stuff and others.

Example:

TOO. MUCH. LOLS. 

Since I mentioned Anthony Kiedis earlier, how awesome was RHCP's performance at the Superbowl halftime!? They have played live (awesomely) countless times before so I don't think a little air guitar/bass is going to hurt anyone. Plus, Give It Away/Storm In A Teacup/Suck My Kiss-esq funky RHCP songs puts you in the best of moods.

Greedy little people in a sea of distress
Keep your more to receive your less
Unimpressed by material excess
Love is free love me say hell yes

Is there a better combination of unparalleled bass slapping/Will Ferrell drummer/sexy lead singer/legendary guitarists (the eternal debate of Frusciante vs Klinghoffer...why not both?)? I think not.

Okay this random ass post is getting lengthy. It's been awhile since I typed so uninhibitedly, but on a less severe scale. It probably doesn't make sense but this feels...nice.

P.S/ I haven't eaten ba kwa yet this CNY. 

Okay random ending now bye!

CNY

Things I have been into lately.

1) My favourite CNY snack: Arrowhead/Chiku chips. Wtf why are these so bloody tasty and addictive!?! I was at my grandma's place eating inhaling these without restraint until I lost it and surprise-shouted "Get these away from me!!!" at my unsuspecting cousin. He quickly took it from me and hid it in the kitchen. I can finish an obscene amount in one sitting (appropriate unit of measurement would be tubs) so thank goodness these are only available during the festive season.

2) Pierce the Veil. Their genre is described as "post-hardcore, experimental rock, progressive rock", but it's just a lot more screaming than I'm used to. I...have no explanation for this.

The water is rusted, the air is unclean
And then for a second I feel fine
This is a wasteland, my only retreat

I've waited all this night to honor you and say,
"I know it's hard but who are you to fall apart on me."

Cause this is a wasteland, my only retreat
With heaven above you, there's hell over me

3) MMA fighters playing with kids. Or just cute guys playing with kids. Can I still say cute boys when I'm approaching 22 without sounding borderline inappropriate? But back to my point,  I just saw Urijah Faber doing this and Bang Yong Guk doing this and it's just...TOO. FLIPPING. CUTE. Cuteness overload la! Plus I make the most embarrassing girlish/pig squeal-like sounds when I see these instances so...that's always attractive.

4) Floral print/dresses/skirts. Also no explanation.

5) Deciding if I should put Drake but...I only listen to a select few of his songs. Also, unnecessary lazy mouth rap infuriates me to no end.

The lyrics might say "Motherfucker never loved us, fucker never loved us", but it probably sounds more like "mu-fucker neh lud us, fucker neh lud us". All I wanted while listening to the song was for Drake to pronounce the -ved properly.

...I cannot think of anything else to replace Drake so I'm just gonna go with him.

-

Awkward ending for an awkward minimal effort post/list.

I really need to get my shit together soon.

ESSAY

Writing essays.

I should be writing my second essay of the week now, but I am not. I am not because I'm easily distracted as fuck by anything that is even remotely more interesting than schoolwork right now. Actually, scratch that. It doesn't even need to be more interesting, it just has to be everything else but an essay.

This is a summary of how a essay is written by a girl who hasn't written proper argumentative essays in forever.

1st hour: Introduction paragraph.
2nd hour: A fully developed point. Fully, if your standards are low.
3rd hour: Editing the 2 paragraphs I have written.
4th hour: Barely starting on my next point.
5th hour-6th hour: The integral parts of the essay + a shitty conclusion. Because I don't have the discipline in me to draft a concise and well thought out concluding paragraph to make them not sound like a rushed and annoyed summary of the things I've already mentioned.

And I usually have no recollection/don't know what the hell I am talking about right after I finish the essay.

The author’s viewpoint, although poignant, is not exclusive to China alone. A country’s national interests are ever changing, and a state’s identity is always an identity in progress. This means that a country’s position and outlook in the international society is not one that is fixed and static, and that makes the uncertainty of a country’s intentions applicable to almost every country worldwide. However, if a country’s national interests are not in tandem with that of the international system’s, it would most probably erupt in aggressive foreign policies and internal instability within the country, possibly even leading to forceful intervention and wars waged by the global community.

What the? 

I think most of my essays are probably 20% semi-developed thoughts and 80%...bullshit and the ability to sound very vague and insightful at the same time. Because I have very little insights. Aiya I didn't study the topic thoroughly enough to be writing an essay about it so...just anyhow whack kekeke.

Just to reiterate, this post is essentially me procrastinating work. Perhaps the essay will write itself tomorrow? I am ready to give in to the latest episode of Criminal Minds already.

DATE

Finally got round to going on a proper date with my favourite girl! ( ˘ ³˘) ♡ 

Decided to go to Bugis on a Sunday since it was nearer and probably less intimidating in terms of human traffic than town. Which...is probably only 30% true because just by coasting the perimeter of Bugis Street, it is evident enough that there are just too damn many people. Or maybe I'm just not used to the weekend crowd. Lol, more likely the latter.

Decided to settle our late lunch/early dinner at Haji lane to escape the horrendous human traffic! There were literally only 3 people in the entire restaurant when we went in, so everything felt really chill and intimate. But I guess that's how most restaurants located there feel like anyway. Girls being girls, we quickly proceeded to lose ourselves in gossip and girl talk and boy talk and everything else under the sun. Lol I think we spent at least 4 hours chatting non-stop. The food was okay I guess, nothing too extraordinary. We ordered mushroom soup (bomb), truffle fries (where the truffle taste at?), pasta with marinara sauce+meatballs (not bad) and roasted chicken cream pasta (super jelat). How do people write restaurant reviews anyway? This entire paragraph is on the verge of turning really awkward and shitty because I can't put together a proper sentence. Okay how about this, the food didn't excite me gastronomically per se, but the service and ambiance are impeccable aaaaand no. Okay, bottom line is I had a really lovely time there. Boom. There, done.

Did a little shopping afterwards and spent a litttttle more than I intended to. 

Me online shopping: Extremely indecisive, mostly ending up not buying anything. 

Me shopping outside: Potentially detrimental to my wallet.

Me shopping outside for an entire day, only to come home and continue shopping online:

 

I foresee my card being on lockdown for the next 1-2 months.

And, the painting in my house is officially 98% done as of today! Just a few more touch-ups here and there and everything is good to go. The whole painting process took longer than anticipated because it had to be stalled in between for the installation of new wardrobes...but can I just express how excited I am? I CAN HAZ NEW WALLS AND FULL LENGTH MIRROR NOW! HEHEHEHEHEHE.

Mama: Since the wardrobes are done in all 3 rooms, you can have this all to yourself.

Me: What! Why would I need so much storage space? I don't even have that many clothes.

Mama: Are you sure? 

Took me awhile to take a proper outfit shot through the mirror too. There are at least 10 other photos of me looking cross-eyed with awkward limb placement and weird possessed looking hands. Actually, I still look a little cross-eyed in the above photos...lolol, I tried my best la.

Oh! Also, I now have a twitter account. Actually if you don't tweet anything and set it private, can you still announce that you have a twitter account? Either way, the best friend has had enough of me being twitter-less and not being able to @mention me, so she went ahead and created one for me when we were chilling at Häagen-Dazs. 

Ger: Eh do you want to upload a photo as your profile picture?

Me: Huh? Don't want la.

Ger: Cause you currently look like an egg.

It's @meishangoh, if anyone is interested.

That's all the updates that I have for now. Time to continue doing the essay that I had originally not want to do but changed my mind because my lecturer sent a very emotional whatsapp message to us and someone replied "Thank you sir for your kind understanding." and it just morphed into a very big guilt trip for me. Sigh, have I also mentioned that I have literally the lowest motivation and drive to study? I have not been very productive this school year and I really really realllllyyy need to get my shit together before it's too late. CMON MEISHAN. GET IT TOGETHER.

!!!!!!!!!! 

Okay, until next time.